Mediation

You have decided on divorce. Why choose mediation?

To know why someone would choose mediation you must know all of your other options first.

Here are your options for divorce to date:

  • Kitchen Table Divorce (you do the paperwork yourself and print offline)
  • Litigation
  • Collaborative Divorce
  • Mediation

You didn’t know you had so many options, did you? Let’s learn about each one so you can make an educated decision about what is best for your family.

The kitchen table divorce is for very simple situations and works well if the relationship lacks financial complexity. This choice will require you to print off the documents from your government website, fill out and submit the documents, and appear in court to finalize. Some people find this to be the best option if they are looking to save money.

The most traditional option for divorce is litigation which is the typical scenario of each person retaining a lawyer and hashing out assets and time with the kids. The communication between clients and attorneys looks like this (C=client/A=Attorney):

C A A C

Ever played the game telephone?

Collaborative divorce and mediation can be lumped together, because they operate on many of the same principles. Here are what each mean:

Mediation: When the couple and one mediator sit together and discuss creative solutions for the uncoupling of the two adults in a way that creates the best possible outcome for everyone. You may not get everything you want, but you have control over your fate instead of a judge.

Collaborative Divorce: This is the same scenario as the above except along with the mediator there is a child specialist, who is typically a counselor, and the attorney(s) is also present. This type of approach is best for very complex situations. The couple is still in the driver’s seat in decision making and get the added benefits of the other professionals’ expertise sharing the room.

The flow of communication in either mediation setting looks like this:

Notice the difference in communication? Everyone is in the loop.

Here is a short list of the benefits of mediation:

  • Quick and cost effective
  • Creative and customized
  • Less likely to end back up in court
  • Both parties feel heard
  • Parties have control over the outcome and timing
  • Empowerment
  • Balances power between parties

If you have any questions or need direction in this area please call and set up a consultation with me. We can talk and discover what the best option is for your family.