PART II: How DBT Can Change Your Life

Introduction

Welcome back to my two-part series on Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT). In the first part, I introduced you to the fundamentals of DBT. Now, let’s explore how DBT can be applied and learn more about how the skills taught through DBT can help improve your life.

Applying DBT Skills in Real Life

The skills training included in DBT is designed to help you develop a more flexible mindset—one that accepts things as they are and recognizes that change is inevitable and doesn’t have to be met with dread or resistance:

• Mindfulness: Don’t worry, this doesn’t mean you have to become a yoga enthusiast (though yoga is great for mindfulness). Mindfulness is all about being present in the moment. The goal is to build awareness of how emotions and thoughts affect our bodies, and how our bodies can affect our emotions and thoughts. You might practice paying attention to your breath, notice physical sensations, or observe your thoughts and feelings without judgement. Imagine being able to stay calm and focused even in the most stressful situations and to respond more effectively to life’s challenges.
• Distress Tolerance: Life is full of unexpected events and challenges, so learning to handle crises without making things worse is crucial. Distress tolerance skills can help you navigate these moments without turning to unhealthy coping mechanisms, like self-harm or substance use. In DBT, you might learn to self-soothe by using your five senses, distraction through activities (like going for a walk or listening to your favorite music), or how to use relaxation techniques like deep breathing to manage intense emotions.
• Regulating Emotions: Research shows emotional dysregulation can occur because of a mix of biological factors and an invalidating environment or trauma experience. DBT aims to help clients understand and manage their emotions better. For example, you might learn to identify and label your emotions accurately, reduce emotional vulnerability by taking care of your physical health (e.g., getting good sleep, eating properly, exercising), or use problem-solving skills to address the causes of distress. By recognizing triggers and implementing emotion regulation strategies, you can reduce emotional outbursts and build a more balanced emotional life.
• Interpersonal Effectiveness: Navigating relationships requires the ability to identify your emotions, express them effectively, assert your needs, and respect other people’s boundaries. DBT equips you with the tools to enhance your interactions with others. You might practice using the D.E.A.R.M.A.N. memory aid (Describe, Express, Assert, Reinforce, Mindful, Appear confident, Negotiate) skills to effectively ask for what you need, how to say no, or resolve conflicts.

Another important tool in DBT is the diary card. The diary card is basically a daily journal entry (don’t be intimidated –you won’t have to do it forever!) that reinforces the core goals of DBT and serves several purposes:

• Tracking Progress: It helps you and your therapist track progress over time by recording your emotions, behaviors, and skills used each day in order to identify patterns and trends – what’s working AND what isn’t.
• Increasing Awareness: By regularly filling out the diary card, you will become more aware of your thoughts, feelings, and actions. This increased self-awareness is crucial for making positive changes in your day-to-day life with friends, family, and colleagues.
• Identifying Triggers: The diary card can help identify specific situations or events that trigger certain emotions or behaviors. This is valuable for developing strategies to cope with or avoid these triggers.
• Monitoring Skills Usage: It helps ensure that you are practicing the DBT skills you’ve learned. It also provides a way to see which skills you are using effectively, and which might need more work.
• Enhancing Communication: The diary card promotes better communication between the you and your therapist. It provides a concrete record that can be reviewed and discussed during therapy sessions.

Ultimately, DBT has been a valuable addition to psychological treatment, offering a unique blend of acceptance and change, as well as practical tools and strategies to navigate life’s challenges and improve overall well-being. Its structured and individualized approaches ensure therapy is tailored to your unique needs. By incorporating mindfulness, distress tolerance, emotion regulation, and interpersonal effectiveness skills, you can change your life in meaningful ways.

If you are looking to learn more about yourself and how DBT may be a path to healing and growth, please call us at 800-353-6402 and schedule an appointment.