The words “shame on you” is a phrase that has certainly been directed your way once or twice in your life. What does it really mean and what is the difference between shame and guilt?
Shame and Guilt are Different Animals
Plainly put, shame is the feeling of being bad and guilt is the feeling of having done something bad.
Shame: “I am a mistake.”
Guilt: “I made a mistake.”
Why the Need to Understand the Difference?
Having a more complex and specific vocabulary of feeling words will not only help you explain yourself more clearly to a spouse, friend or therapist, but also will help you understand yourself more deeply and enable you to do the work you need to do to reach your goal of becoming happier and more balanced.
Did You Know….?
Shame is highly, highly correlated with addiction, depression, violence, aggression, bullying, suicide, eating disorders.
Here’s what you even need to know more: Guilt is inversely correlated with those things. The ability to hold something we’ve done, or failed to do, up against who we want to be is incredibly adaptive. It’s uncomfortable, but it’s adaptive.
Click to watch a TED talk on the subject>>>> Click
Kristen Neal is a Licensed Professional Counselor and Clinical Director at Greenway Therapy . Learn more about her on her BIO page.